What wikipedia has to say about my relationship, and what I have to say.

Disclaimer, We are not your typical gay couple. Shawn is 27 years my senior, and I am 22, do the math. We have a father(Daddy)/son dynamic to our relationship, but are not confined to it. I consider us a bear/cub couple, but again we do not restrict ourselves to such labels. Hope you enjoy this, and learn a bit more about us.


According to wikipedia, "A Daddy in gay culture is an older man sexually involved in a relationship or having a sexual interest in a younger man or son (gay culture). The age gap may differ, but the relationship involves the traditional parental hierarchy of father-son dynamics, the daddy providing emotional support and guidance along with sexual encouragement and nurturing to the inexperienced and vulnerable partner. The typical interpretation usually includes the dad taking the sexual role of top (sex) while the bottom (sex) role is ascribed to the son, though actually many relationships work the other way round or have no such strict behavioural categories rooted in anal sex."

While this is true about Shawn and myself, there are many other factors that play into our relationship. In many ways Shawn is the Father I wished I had growing up, But I know I am suffering from the "grass is greener on the other side" syndrome. So instead of getting into some sick idea of incest, I am thankful that Shawn came into my life when he did. He fulfills the need in my life for a strong masculine father figure. I strive to please him, not as a slave, or bottom, but rather as a "mentee", or son. I love it when Shawn shows me a new concept, or shows me a new experience. Shawn is teaching me to let go, and live life as it happens. This is not easy for me but i am working on it. Shawn is the top, and I am the bottom, but our roles are not as black and white as you may think. But the bedroom talk will stay there, and you, my friend will just have to use your imagination. Now being a bottom does not mean that I am less masculine, it only means that I allow my partner to take control of the situation. Much of my childhood, I had to initiate my own interests. If I say something I liked, I'd look it up, and then try it. This is how I got started in yo-yo's and into BMX. My parents simply watched, they never forced anything on me.
My father is what people my age would generally call pussy whipped. If he's alone he'll be one of the guys, if he's with my ma, he does whatever she wants. For a kid who grew up idolizing cops, and marines, this was a severe shock to how I viewed my father's masculinity. It also made me question my own masculine image. Around this time, as I stated before, I found myself in abusive relationships, and i stayed in them because I believed that was what i deserved. Well that has changed since meeting Shawn. I have found a man with whom I can be emotional with, and still be a "man" around. While foolin' around one time we pushed my limits a bit too far, and I broke down. I kept on telling Shawn that "I was sorry, and that I had let him down." This was the beginning of me opening up to him. Since that time, I have slowly allowed myself to share personal issues, and thoughts with him. Shawn has also done the same with me. We were both open books to each other when we first met, and we both have had our share of assholes in the past. And Yes, we both were with women, and still look at them from time to time. Though we both have been with women, Shawn actually was married. Shawn can use his experience as a married man to mentor me with dealing with my own feelings. There is a certain amount of shock that one goes through after being with a girl, and then falling in love with a man. To stop myself before I totally confuse you, Shawn and I are not like any other couple you've seen or met before. I love him, and he's the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.