Judge me on the contents of my character, and not the colour of my skin.
Judge me on the contents of my character, And not the clothes i wear.
Judge me on the contents of my character, And not the words i use.
Judge me on the contents of my character, And not the music i listen to.
Judge me on the contents of my character, And not the car I drive.
Judge me on the contents of my character, And not the company I keep.
Judge me on the contents of my character, And not the Job I keep.
Judge me on the contents of my character, And not the sex of my partner.
Judge me on the contents of my character, Or judge me not.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Honor
I am a firm believer in Chi, and Honor. Being adopted, I have lost some honor and dignirty because i am not being raised in my homeland or culture. But I will never know this for sure, until the day that I actually visit Korea. I have had alot to deal with growing up, IE, visiting courtrooms, halfways homes, and shelters, all to see my sister Mary. From the age to 8 she has been a problem in the family, and this is where i formed my attraction(plutonic) to cops. I was there for her, and yet, when it comes to me needing a family member supporter, she shys away, nice. There's one thing to remember about honor, as many asians believe, you bring honor to your family. But I have had to come to the realization that This is not true. ONLY I CAN BRING HONOR to MYSELF. My family, and friends cannot bring honor to me, it all lays upon myself. You know destiny is a funny thing, we have no absolute control over it. All we can do is do things that influence our destiny. Just the random thoughts of the day.
Slante'
Kim Chung-Ro
Slante'
Kim Chung-Ro
Thursday, July 10, 2008
It's been a while
It's been a while since i last posted, and or made a video, so here I am, posting again to say i am not dead...yet. No I am not suicidal, but there are some concerns in my life that have made me come to the realization that something needs to change.
As some of you know, ok, as all of you know, I've been looking for a job in the NH area for a while, with no luck. Well there is a position at the local hospital that is open that i am applying for. While it's not my type of work, it's work none the less. And the health bennies, Damn! If i have to take a size-able pay cut for this job, i just may do that. You see, it's been three months since i last saw the doc for my diabetes, and that visit wasn't good. I've been on the decline for a year, and haven't been doin' well. When i was diagnosed at the age of 18 i took my meds, and was serious about testing three times a day. My A1C was about a 7 and I was fairly healthy. Last year, I went to the doctor, and my A1C was a 12.8 and my doc gave me a 5-7 year time line before i'd be on dialysis and 10-12 year period before i would be dead or need full time hospital care. I'm fucking 22, how sick is that to think I could be dead in ten years. But you know what, maybe i want that...Maybe i am tired of the stresses in life, and maybe I've been trying to kill myself. When I last went to the doc 6 months ago, my doc told me I needed to go on insulin, and if i didn't within 3 years I'd be on dialysis, and 5-7 years dead.
My folks are pressing the issue of me being gay, and are making it some sort of issue. In reality being gay isn't an issue at all, and is fine. But if it really was fine, would kissing, holding hands and hugging in public really be such a big deal? I mean I'd love the chance to hug and kiss Shawn like Tara and John do in public, without the fear of being bashed. Well back to my folks, it seems to be that they will accept Shawn when it's convenient to them, like when we installed the radio in my car. It's a cheap system, but it was a project Shawn and i did together(ok mostly Shawn) and we worked together for a common goal. I in turn learned a lot, and got a kick ass system, and Shawn did something he enjoyed, and got to see something he did, bring pleasure to someone he cares about. Isn't that what relationships are about? Enjoying the little things together? Why can't they see that for once, I have trust in another person, I love another person, and that person loves me.
I've had my SIR/Masters, and guys who told me what to do, when to eat, and who to see. Shawn doesn't do any of that, and still at times, I almost expects him to do that. But it's not in him, it's not who he is. I need to focus in on who I"m with now, and stop thinking about who I've been with. It is for this reason that IK choose to live. I choose to fight, not only for my rights, but for my life. Even if Shawn was to dump me, I'd still want to live, because he has given me hope. He has shown me that not all men are dicks. Then there's my bro, Mike. Mike is not the first guy you'd picture me liking. And I will admit that I used to avoid and bash guys like Mike, but here I am on the same side, and the tables are turned. How can i bash a guy like myself? ok, so he's not a hyper masculine biker/leather guy, who walks around with the ghetto attitude, but he is a man, and one cool one at that. Oh and urrr, i guess we do share an interest in leather...LOL! I know, TMI.
Mike has shown me a softer side, and has offered me a unique friendship that I cannot describe. He has offered advise when I've needed it, and is not afraid to be open and honest. Well, I am at work, and I will have to post a part two.
Peace out,
Slante'
Kim-Chung-Ro
As some of you know, ok, as all of you know, I've been looking for a job in the NH area for a while, with no luck. Well there is a position at the local hospital that is open that i am applying for. While it's not my type of work, it's work none the less. And the health bennies, Damn! If i have to take a size-able pay cut for this job, i just may do that. You see, it's been three months since i last saw the doc for my diabetes, and that visit wasn't good. I've been on the decline for a year, and haven't been doin' well. When i was diagnosed at the age of 18 i took my meds, and was serious about testing three times a day. My A1C was about a 7 and I was fairly healthy. Last year, I went to the doctor, and my A1C was a 12.8 and my doc gave me a 5-7 year time line before i'd be on dialysis and 10-12 year period before i would be dead or need full time hospital care. I'm fucking 22, how sick is that to think I could be dead in ten years. But you know what, maybe i want that...Maybe i am tired of the stresses in life, and maybe I've been trying to kill myself. When I last went to the doc 6 months ago, my doc told me I needed to go on insulin, and if i didn't within 3 years I'd be on dialysis, and 5-7 years dead.
My folks are pressing the issue of me being gay, and are making it some sort of issue. In reality being gay isn't an issue at all, and is fine. But if it really was fine, would kissing, holding hands and hugging in public really be such a big deal? I mean I'd love the chance to hug and kiss Shawn like Tara and John do in public, without the fear of being bashed. Well back to my folks, it seems to be that they will accept Shawn when it's convenient to them, like when we installed the radio in my car. It's a cheap system, but it was a project Shawn and i did together(ok mostly Shawn) and we worked together for a common goal. I in turn learned a lot, and got a kick ass system, and Shawn did something he enjoyed, and got to see something he did, bring pleasure to someone he cares about. Isn't that what relationships are about? Enjoying the little things together? Why can't they see that for once, I have trust in another person, I love another person, and that person loves me.
I've had my SIR/Masters, and guys who told me what to do, when to eat, and who to see. Shawn doesn't do any of that, and still at times, I almost expects him to do that. But it's not in him, it's not who he is. I need to focus in on who I"m with now, and stop thinking about who I've been with. It is for this reason that IK choose to live. I choose to fight, not only for my rights, but for my life. Even if Shawn was to dump me, I'd still want to live, because he has given me hope. He has shown me that not all men are dicks. Then there's my bro, Mike. Mike is not the first guy you'd picture me liking. And I will admit that I used to avoid and bash guys like Mike, but here I am on the same side, and the tables are turned. How can i bash a guy like myself? ok, so he's not a hyper masculine biker/leather guy, who walks around with the ghetto attitude, but he is a man, and one cool one at that. Oh and urrr, i guess we do share an interest in leather...LOL! I know, TMI.
Mike has shown me a softer side, and has offered me a unique friendship that I cannot describe. He has offered advise when I've needed it, and is not afraid to be open and honest. Well, I am at work, and I will have to post a part two.
Peace out,
Slante'
Kim-Chung-Ro
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